Why we departed at 12:00, I have no idea. We are three hours behind schedule but we are on our way in the midst of traffic on the Dan Ryan. We almost didn’t go, but Grandpa Kantarek twisted our arms and shamed us into keeping our promises.

Why Detroit? We’re visiting our good friends over at i3Detroit. We should hopefully arrive before 8pm Detroit time, but we’ll be keeping the entire Internet up to date on our progress and the shenanigans involved.

Current Location: Mile Marker 73. I-94, Illinois.

Update: 12:50pm.

Current Location: INDIANA.

Update: 1:10pm. First stop: Cracker Barrel. CIGARETTE.

Next Stop: Cracker Barrel. Oh my god, Cracker Barrel. The delicious, delicious food of America’s greatest restaurant chain. Hello chicken and dumplings.

Update: 2:15pm. Current Location: Leaving Cracker Barrel, barely inside of Indiana.

We all want to die, so much tasty food. If any of you reading this have never been to Cracker Barrel, you are doing something wrong with your life.

Update: 2:30pm. Current Location: Gas Station. Alignment is causing weird noises. Jim has lowered his survival rating.

Update: 2:53pm. Current Location: MICHIGAN! Been reading reddit. Cars are boring. Jim turned into a 5 year old boy when we saw the toy train store billboard. We might have to stop there.

Update: 3:17pm. Current Location: Exit 39. I-94. Michigan. Next stop: Grandpa’s Cider Mill. Note: Jim snores.

Update: 4:06pm. Current Location: I-94. Michigan. Battery is about to die. Cider was delicious. Highly recommend visiting Grandpa’s Cider Mill in Coloma, MI. Tasty.